About two years ago Summer (my wife) and I decided to quit building churches (not literally, but figuratively).  We simply looked and found Jesus was very clear: He builds churches, we make disciples.  I know what you’re thinking, “Churches make disciples!”  When I hear that I start squirming in my seat, because I don’t believe it’s actually happening effectively.

Here is how I was taught to make disciples.  Once someone makes a decision to follow Christ you invite them to attend a discipleship class (these classes have different names but do the same thing).  The class instructs the new believer how to “be different.”  The problem is you don’t learn to be a disciple, you must live it.  Being a disciple and making disciples is about the going: not to church, but going as the church. As you live with people becoming disciples (this is called making disciples and it’s messy) you notice this band of people become much more than friends, they are your church.  I could say a lot more…but let’s stop here.

Because recently I have been discouraged, not at any one particular person or event, just false expectations I have created.  It’s hard to go through de-toxic of everything you’ve come to believe about the kingdom of God. My biggest down fall has been relationships.  I’d developed a “pulpit pastor” mentality about people over the last ten years.  Stand in the pulpit and tell them how to think, act, and respond to God – but at all cost guard myself from actually openness about my own life.  I feared rejection or worse lost disciples.  It’s hard to make disciples if you’re afraid of people.

Last week as I whined, Summer asked the big question:  Who are you discipling?  Who are you meeting with daily or weekly?  I had to confess no one regularly (sigh).  She really stuck it to me.

But as much as it hurt to answer – I respect her more than anyone.  She practices making disciples.  That is what is so attractive about her.  She surrounds her life with people becoming disciples.  Not viewing them as teacher/student, but as equals.  She is a true model of what Jesus called us to do: go and make disciples.

I have an amazing wife that not only challenges my life but has all my love.